How long will I love you?
How long will my love for you last night? Your sleepless night told me you couldn't go back, you were lost. I felt like I'd fallen into an abyss, time seemed to stand still for a long time…
Today I'm so tired, I haven't been able to stop for a moment. But I still insist on writing this down, whether you see it or not, I hope to preserve my heartfelt words here and now. You asked me about my recent life and work, and I dared not answer. I'm working with abandon, rushing to the next destination, hoping to have less to worry about you, less to be distracted. I've said I'm busy, but I always manage to find time to talk to you. I remember you talking about the cold, helpless loneliness of waking up in the middle of the night; I've experienced that feeling, and I just want to be that tiny, glimmering match in the darkness. You often say I can do things well even when I'm distracted, except this time. You said my shadow is everywhere, in every moment of your life. I can't look you in the eye, I'm afraid of hurting you again. Knowing you're suffering and helpless right now, I'm afraid every wrong word I say will affect your future. You said you couldn't calm down, and so could I. I feigned indifference, just so you could think things through calmly. You said my heartless appearance masked my heart-wrenching pain.
You slandered your own character, you gave up. Please don't say that; I find it hard to accept such words. You've always seemed to doubt my sincerity, and I often find myself speechless. Yet, every moment I feel your tolerance towards me. I remain silent; what else can I do? If you can overcome your current predicament, I'd rather be the one who's lost. If you can stop being sad, what does it matter if I turn away, hurt again? Because we are each other's brightest stars in the night sky.
I don't know how long this love will last, or if it will slowly fade away like the sea washing over the sand. You said I was foolishly naive; please don't say that about yourself anymore; you're tearing my heart apart.
I'm tired. I hope you get better, even if it's just a sliver of my light illuminating you.
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