A letter to my rebellious daughter

 　　Xin Xin: My dearest daughter!

　　School starts in a few days. And after September, you'll be saying goodbye to your innocent and romantic childhood, your poetic and picturesque adolescence, and stepping into the vibrant years of youth. Today, Dad wants to say a few words from my heart to you.

　　Xin Xin, you've always been well-behaved, obedient, lively, and adorable. You loved to walk with Dad's arm, and you were always willing to discuss your studies with me. Back then, you never bought snacks, ate the same meals as us, and never received any special treatment. You also lived up to our expectations in your studies, consistently ranking among the top students in your class. You received many awards, and Dad has always treasured all your certificates. When I have free time, I take them out to look at them, and it brings me a sense of pride and satisfaction. After your second-grade final exams, you called me and said, "Dad, guess how I did on my final exams?" I said, "You must have done great!" You said, "Dad, guess again, how many points did I get?" I couldn't guess no matter how hard I tried, but finally you told me, "100 in Chinese and 99 in Math." Hearing your grades, I shared in your joy of success and felt truly happy!

　　However, this happy time didn't last long. In fourth grade, English was added to your curriculum, and math became much more difficult. Perhaps you didn't grasp the key learning methods, because your math and English scores never exceeded 90 points, and your class ranking dropped to around 30th. Xin Xin, think back to whether your studies lacked planning and methods. After school, you put down your schoolbag and either watch TV or go online, resulting in you still doing homework past 11 pm. In the morning, your mom has to call you several times before you get up. Of course, we don't want to see you buried in books all day. You can surf the internet and watch TV after finishing your homework...

　　When you were in fourth or fifth grade, to make us happy, you only told us good news and not bad, sometimes even exaggerating your grades. I was very angry when I found out. I told you, "Grades aren't the most important thing; the process is important, and having good moral character is important. As long as you've tried your best, Dad won't blame you, and you won't regret it later." Xin Xin, lying only gives us temporary "happiness," but you lose the most precious thing: honesty. Xin Xin, what parent doesn't hope their child will succeed? Dad does care about your grades now, and I hope you study hard and become a useful person to your family and society in the future.

　　Xin Xin, do you remember? You were very diligent when you were little. Before going to bed, you would fold your clothes neatly and put them on your study desk. How tidy your room was back then! But now? You leave leftover food and wrappers on the table, and your personal belongings are scattered all over the room. I know you're under a lot of academic pressure right now, but surely you have time to tidy your room?

　　Xin Xin, the competition in the future society will ultimately be a competition of abilities and qualities, and among those qualities, physical fitness is the most important material foundation. Right now, your mother, in order to make you feel less wronged and happier, takes care of everything for you—food, clothing, shelter, and daily necessities—allowing you to live a life where you're waited on hand and foot, without even the most basic self-care activities. This has led to your lack of housework and physical exercise. Dad hopes you can play ball or go for a run in the neighborhood when you have time, developing a habit of exercising. At the same time, I also hope you can share some housework, at least doing things for yourself, such as washing your own underwear and shoes, and making your bed, so you can find enjoyment in housework and sports, and strengthen your willpower.

　　Xin Xin, before we know it, you're in the second year of junior high school, growing from a little girl who relied on us into a thoughtful young woman who yearns for independence. However, it is precisely this growth that has led to your rebellion, willfulness, and refusal to communicate. The smallest things make you angry; if the food doesn't suit your taste or you're not allowed to go out to play, you give me a hard time. Yesterday, you and Mom argued about your studies. One of you was forceful, the other was verbally abusive. Hearing the heavy slam of the door, I felt a mix of emotions—heartache, sadness, and helplessness? I really couldn't say.

　　Xin Xin, my daughter, your joys and sorrows, your every word and action, constantly tug at my heartstrings. How could I forget the times you brought me water and medicine when I was sick? How could I forget the "Three Good Student" awards and the all-around development award you received at school… I've been through it all; I know that excessive compliance delays independence. The more "obedient" you are, the more likely you are to fear failure later in life. I know you are currently filled with confusion, impulsiveness, and anxiety. The essence of rebellion is that you are beginning to challenge authority with independent thinking and build an independent personality. It means your mind is gradually maturing, you have your own thoughts and insights, and you have your own way of handling things, which makes me feel gratified. Moreover, your rebelliousness is a necessary stage in your growth, an unavoidable reaction in your exploration of yourself and your search for identity.

　　Xin Xin, you are intelligent and possess an indomitable courage. I also believe you can do very well; in fact, you are already doing so. For example, when Mom criticizes your messy desk, you say, "Mom, Mom, go back to your room first, give me two minutes." Sometimes, you even say, "At least I did better than yesterday, right?" Seeing the expectation and longing for praise in your eyes makes me feel that my daughter has grown up! Xin Xin, I know that sometimes you feel we don't understand you, and you may even resent our advice. I know that your mother and I sometimes have a one-sided approach to your upbringing, and sometimes even make mistakes. I hope you can understand that.

　　Finally, Dad hopes that you will bravely pursue your dreams, have the ability to stand on your own in society in the future, dare to face various challenges in life and work, and become a trendsetter of the times!

　　Your loving Dad